


A Christmas Peril

by orphan_account



Category: Once Upon A Time - Fandom
Genre: Abandoned Work - Unfinished and Discontinued, Gen
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2012-11-18
Updated: 2012-12-11
Packaged: 2017-11-18 22:53:12
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 5,668
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/566169
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Discontinued. With absolute certainty, Regina hated this curse. Because throughout all of town, people were speaking in verse. Twas the night before Christmas, and as she would see...payback's a bitch, with a very high fee. Or: Kris Kringle has his memories back and gets unconventional revenge on the person who cursed him. An OUAT Christmas Carol, Regina-centric.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Prologue

**Prologue:** Kris Kringle is a man who knows how to mingle

Mary Margaret sighed as drew up her jacket tighter around her shoulders, watching as her breath exhaled in a small puff. Winters in Maine weren't anything to underestimate, and despite her original name-sake she wasn't a fan of the weather it brought. Cold wasn't fun at all, especially since she didn't have a car and still had about twenty presents to buy still. Formerly rooming with seven men, having a suddenly extended family, and being an unofficial ruler without a salary didn't make gift buying cheap. Still, it was hard to hate Christmas. It was the one time that everyone in Storybrooke seemed…happy.

Well, everyone except for perhaps their dear Mayor. But some things were in the realm of possibility and some were not, as Mary Margaret kept forcing herself to remember.

Shuffling a bag from her left arm to her right, Mary Margaret tried to keep everything balanced as she walked the commercial district of the town. She had managed to get most of her shopping done during her afternoon off, save something for Emma and Henry. Not a bad accomplishment, but trying to find something appropriate for her twenty-eight year old daughter's first real Christmas wasn't going to come easy. Or for her grandson. Grandson. It still seemed unbelievable to her.

As she walked, Mary Margaret couldn't help but come to a slow stop in front of a toy store. She remembered it from before the curse- the place had been boarded up and dirty, and she'd never seen a customer. But now it looked radiant, the walls were painted a fresh red and inside she saw several children from her class running around looking at hand-crafted toys. Mary Margaret looked inside the window, and had to laugh at all the wooden sword and shield sets inside. Silently ruling out Emma, she decided to go in and see if there might be something Henry would like.

The door to the store opened with the sound of a bell ringing, and Mary Margaret took off her hat as the sudden blast of heat hit her. The store was, well, homey. The lights were all dimmed for an antique feel and the unmistakable smell of freshly-baked cookies hit her nose. Whatever the curse had done to the store, breaking it had done wonders to fix it.

Without much preamble, Mary Margaret made her way over to the toy weapons she had seen earlier. Henry might try to fool everyone with his Operation of the week, but Mary Margaret could still see the ten-year-old underneath the forced adult seriousness. And ten-year-olds, in her 28 years of experience teaching them, were fond of things that they could use to hit other things.

She had to fight a smile as she went sorting through them, noticing that they each had insignia for different clans or houses. She was looking at one that held a lion when a booming, but kind, voice sounded over her shoulder.

"Ah now," a wiry-looking man, with spectacles on his nose and a big tuft of a white beard on his chin said, "That's certainly a good choice."

Mary Margaret turned over her shoulder and offered a smile, "Thanks. It's for my-" she paused, "It's for Henry."

The man's eyebrows rose over the edge of the spectacles, and he gave a hum of thought, "Oh, would that be the Mayor's boy?"

Mary's smile tightened slightly, "Yes." And, as if to assert a personal connection to him, she added, "He's ten."

The older man grinned, "Yes, he's been in the shop before. A good lad, and usually nice."

"He is," Mary agreed, picking up the fake sword and looking at the price tag. Seeing none, she started looking around, trying to find some indicator.

The man laughed, "That'll be twenty dollars, though I'll be glad to lower it if you'll do me a small kindness?"

Startled, Mary turned fully around, "Oh, I'm sorry. I didn't realize…"

"That I owned the store?" The man shook his head but he was still smiling, "It's quite alright."

"You want me to do you a favor, Mr. ?"

"You can call me Kris. And yes, it's a very small one," waving a hand to indicate that she should follow, Kris made his way to the counter. Warily, Mary obeyed, still holding on to the lion's sword. "You see, the good Mayor ordered something special for Henry this Christmas, but hasn't been able to collect," he bent below the glass shelves, fishing for a package, "Would you mind delivering it to her?"

Mary Margaret stared in confusion, "Um, I'm sorry. You don't know me, but the Mayor and I don't…really…get along."

"Oh?" Kris blinked owlishly behind his glasses. No small part of Mary suspected it was a willful foolishness he was enacting, "Well. No matter. If you'd just be so kind as to drop it in the mailbox for her then? It's sturdy, I promise-"

"I don't think I'd feel comfortable…"

Kris beamed, lifting up a matching lion-themed shield, "I'll throw in the other half of the set for free!"

Mary stared at him, then the sword, then the shield. She groaned.

"Fine. The mailbox only." She paused, "What is it?"

"Just a remote controlled helicopter, if memory serves," Kris stated, bending down again and withdrawing a plain, brown paper-wrapped package. In black marker "For Henry" was written across it. Mary visibly relaxed at the normalcy of the gift. But something about all this still felt…off.

As if sensing her wavering resolve, Kris gave another big smile that reminded Mary Margaret of a joyful Santa, "So that'll be ten dollars for both of young Henry's gifts, then?"

Mary Margaret caved, "Fine. But if she asks I wasn't the one to deliver it."

He laughed, a big, booming sound, "You have yourself a deal, Miss."

Mary Margaret quickly paid for the toys, taking the brown package under her arm and retreating from the store. With her back to the counter, she was oblivious to the way Kris's expression darkened and a slow, mischievous smile crawled upon his face.

III

Regina scowled as she made her way up the walkway to her house, eyeing the slowly falling snowflakes with barely concealed contempt. Her time in Maine had not warmed her up to snow. It didn't matter that tomorrow was Christmas Eve, she wasn't looking forward to having to shovel the walkway or scrape the ice off the windows.

She wasn't looking forward to Christmas, period.

Her heels snapped on the pavement as she stopped in front of the mailbox, opening the latch and withdrawing a heavy stack of bills.

And something else.

Her eyebrows furrowed as she withdrew a plain brown box, wrapped in twine of all things with her son's name scribbled across it.

Who would be sending Henry something that looked like it was sent by the unibomber?

Placing her bills back inside of the mailbox, Regina took the box and gave it an expectant shake. Something rolled around in it and only furthered both her curiosity and her paranoia. It was hardly a secret that she wasn't the town's favorite, and she wouldn't put it past some of the cretins in Storybrooke to get back at her through using her son.

Better just to open it. She had magic to defend her if need be.

Tugging on the string and mentally preparing to cast a freezing spell, Regina untied the box. The paper fell off easily enough, revealing a nondescript shoe box. Frowning, she used her free hand to pull off the lid.

Inside was…

A lump of coal?

Was this someone's sorry excuse for a joke?

Snorting, Regina reached in and grabbed it. Coal. How refreshing to see that the townspeople's sense of humor was up to par-

Regina bit back a startled gasp, her eyes widening as the coal flashed with light, becoming a dark shade of purple before going back to its original black color.

"What in the…"

It didn't seem magical. But there had been something wrong with it. Regina tossed it back in the box, trying not to notice the strange…feeling that had come over her. After all...

The present was harmless, there was nothing strange to be seen. Perhaps she had imagined, that strange oily sheen? There was no need to be paranoid, it was only a rock. Even though when she touched it, there had been a great shock.

But so it was without worry or care, that Regina decided to ignore the affair. After all, it was almost time for Christmas, and she had yet to decorate the yard. For tomorrow Henry was visiting, thankfully without his Charming crowd. There was much to be done, all overnight, to make sure Henry had fun, and to see she was right.

Reality check restored, Regina went inside. And all of her worry, began to subside. She had things to do and some stress was forming.

Which was probably why she failed to notice the warning.

Because despite her belief that the coal held no curse, all of her thoughts, were starting to form into verse.


	2. Emma Swan

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> And with much a racket, Emma Swan becomes dear Bob Cratchitt

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for all the kudos and subscriptions!

Twas eight fifteen, when the alarm clock did sound. And Regina rolled over, as her headache did pound. It was still far too early, and she tried to find snooze. While her headache continued, likely a result of the booze. Maybe last night, she had been too liberal with wine. But who could blame her, it was hardly a crime. For all of last night, and part of the morning, she had been subjected to Christmas decorating- from ceiling to flooring. It was hardly the best use of her time, but it was all for Henry and-

…and was she thinking in rhyme?

Regina sat up, and with eyes narrowed in confusion, she began to wonder if perhaps, she was suffering from a contusion. Had she hit her head, setting up a tree light? Because her brain kept on rhyming, and it was giving her fright. This wasn't normal, her mind didn't think in verse. No sane person's would, unless they were cursed-

And then finally, her heart beating fast, Regina remembered, that strange coal at last. Had she been hit by a terrible spell? Was that why this awful rhyming, was refusing to quell? But who had sent that coal, who could be so bitter? And why did it have to be today, when Regina was all out of liquor?

Her jaw clenched tight, and she stood out of bed. There was one way to see, if this was all in her head. Regina cleared her throat, and let out a word, a word with no rhyme, no rhythm or note:

"Orange," Regina declared, and smile she did, when she walked to the door, and opened its hinge-

"Damn it," she hissed, for hinge and orange were near-rhymes, and now she was pissed.

Someone had cursed her, to suffer this affliction. And it was Christmas Eve, one man's jurisdiction. As Regina went to her closet, she began to dress. There was one man to blame, the cause of this mess.

As she put on her coat, of Dulce and Galbana, Regina firmly resolved, that she would destroy Santa.

III

The sheriff's station wasn't the most popular place on Christmas Eve, and Emma found herself thankful for it. An empty set of cells meant a night on stand-by, where she could relax without having to worry about fairy tale villains wreaking havoc or whatever it was that evil creatures did on the postcard holidays. Despite the unordinary high amounts of alcoholics, mobs, property damage, murders, and general civil unrest- Emma Swan had managed to secure herself a day off. Something that hadn't happened in, well, ever. Now she was beginning to question the benefits package.

Shaking her head, Emma shrugged off her brown leather sheriff's coat and went to start locking up. While Christmas had never exactly been a favorite time for her, only a painful reminder of what the other kids were doing while she was being shuffled around from house to house, this year there was something to look forward to. Emma failed to hide the hint of a smile as she unhooked the handcuffs from her belt, mind drifting to the set of self-defense books she had purchased for Henry. Christmas with the kid might not be so bad, even if he was spending half of it with Mommy Sociopathest. The fact that Emma would be spending the holiday with her own…parents, wasn't something that she really wanted to invest too much time thinking about. It was still way too weird. And even on stand-by, the only alcohol Emma could have tonight was the eggnog that came in cardboard carton.

Walking over to the last set of lights, Emma's hint of a smile morphed into a full grin as she went to hit the switch. Free at last-

Emma heard the tell-tale sound of ridiculously expensive pumps hitting linoleum down the hall and groaned. Speak of the sociopath. Leave it to Regina to have some business the day of Christmas Eve.

Knowing that she really shouldn't expect anything else, Emma moved from the door with a resigned sigh. Looks like maybe the night off wouldn't be happening. Especially with the way Regina slammed open the sheriff's office door without knocking.

Emma crossed her arms, raising an eyebrow at the mayor as she entered. Regina was scowling darkly, but that was nothing new.

"I'm guessing you're not here to drop off some cookies."

Regina's scowl was now directed at her. And she shook her head.

Silence stretched for a few uncomfortable seconds, the office's clock the only sound.

Finally, the sheriff tilted her head in confusion. What was this, Simon Says? "So…"

The mayor continued to glare.

O…kay, "Why are you here?"

Regina inhaled sharply, and it seemed as if her nostrils were almost flaring. Emma got the charming mental image of a bull in a rodeo.

She rolled her eyes, "Look, Regina. I have today off and I'd like to spend some time with my kid-" the nostrils flared more, "-so if you don't have anything pressing at the moment I'd like to lock up-"

Regina snorted, "How typical, Sheriff Swan, for you to leave your job. What if there's danger, like a shooter or mob?" Her eyes widened almost immediately as she said it. Emma, however, didn't notice the slip.

Emma glared, "I have the dispatch line ready to go and I'll be on standby. Contrary to what you believe, Regina, I can do my job without a babysitter."

The mayor began to pace, all about the room. On her sharp face there was, a feeling of unending doom. Her thoughts made Emma pause, something wasn't right here. There was something…off-tempo, but it wasn't yet clear.

"Fine if you must know, I believe I've been cursed," Regina began, as if she'd rehearsed, "There's a man I need to find, his goes by Kris Kringle, and this stupid magic's his kind."

Emma then realized, what was getting so weird, "You mean Santa Claus? The guy with the beard?"

"We've had a few disagreements, in regards to the season," Regina sighed, "I'm sure you imagine, why I might have my reasons."

The sheriff of Storybooke, had no clue what to say. This was ridiculous, and for this the job didn't pay. "You want me to press charges, against Santa Claus?"

"I believe all this rhyming, is probable cause."

The statement was heavy, and hung in the air. And as Emma realized, she began to despair. "Great, now I'm rhyming, from your dumb stupid spell."

Regina's smile was cruel, "Isn't it swell?"

Emma went back, to grab her handcuffs, "You really think, arresting Santa's enough?"

The mayor glared, "It's a good start, but he's most likely hidden."

The sheriff sighed, "You realize you're ruining, Christmas for children?"

The statement gave Regina a significant pause, for her son did believe in one Santa Claus. Christmas was the favorite holiday for Henry, had been for forever, since he was a baby. And though Regina was less than thrilled, with this new speaking style…she hadn't seen Henry, happy for a very long while.

"Just look for him Swan, he needs to be found. This man is a menace, a red-suited clown."

Emma groaned, sitting back in her chair. Looks like she wasn't going home, until she took care of the Mayor. "You know that today, I was going to leave? To take some time off, and enjoy my reprieve?"

Regina's eyes rolled, "How cruel of me, Sheriff, to make you work during the week. It doesn't matter to me, whether your holidays are bleak. I'm subject to an attack, and for now your only goal…should be to find the man who cursed me, who gave me stupid coal."

At that Emma snickered, laugh happy and loud, "He actually gave you coal? Consider me wowed."

"Just do your work," the Mayor said with a scowl, "Before all this cute rhyming, begins to go foul."

"It's not like I have a very good choice. Since I'm sure you noticed, the rhyming's also in my voice."

"Now we understand each other, do we have a deal?" Regina asked promptly.

"It's still hard to really believe, that this crap is real," Emma said darkly.

"I'll be back tomorrow, I assume you'll have the culprit."

"Tomorrow is Christmas, you know that's total bullshit!"

"I don't think crime cares, whether it's Christmas day," Regina grinned, "And as you should know, I control all your pay."

Emma fell quiet, full of resent. For even though it was Christmas…she still had to pay rent.

And with that, Regina left with a huff. She had to go quickly, before Emma would call her bluff. For even though Regina was truly a victim...the Mayor had no real control, over a sheriff's income.

III

After her talk Sheriff Swan, Regina decided to keep walking, to move it along. For although it was Christmas Eve, and people were jolly, Regina decided not to test, this curse's new folly. Turns out it would spread, from person to person- a plague of good cheer, an unchecked contagion! The Queen couldn't stomach, a town full of carol, for surely it was, the ultimate Christmas peril.

So immersed was Regina, with her thoughts of detest, that she didn't notice as she collided, straight into David's chest.

"Whoa, Regina, are you alright?" David asked, clearly alarming.

Of all people she had to cross, of course she would run into Charming.

"I'm fine, do get out of my way," Regina said, trying to make it a day.

"I guess it's good I ran into you," David said, with a smile most sad, "It seems like poor Henry's, come down with the flu."

That made Regina pause, dead in her step, "Are you sure it's just flu? Or could it be strep?"

David just shrugged, his head a big block, "I'm not sure, but Snow's taking him to the doc."

The Queen did glare, anger quickly forming, "And you weren't going to tell me, until after this morning?"

"Look I know you're worried, but he's probably contagious. And I don't think being angry will help, or acting outrageous."

"Where is Henry, I need to see my son," Regina protested, jumping the gun.

"He's resting at the moment, poor kid's sleeping sound," David paused, "But if you'd like, maybe later, you can come around?"

Her teeth grinding, Regina declared, "I don't need permission to see my son, or to see how he fairs."

David rose his hands, a gesture of peace, "I know that Regina, I'm not trying to be the police."

"Then get out of my way," Regina said, "You and your dumb flannel fleece."

Charming looked down, as if to double check. The fleece was gift from Snow, with a matching turtleneck. David gave a sigh, and knew there was no winning with the Queen. No matter what the season, she was always so damn mean.

"If you want to stop by tomorrow, we're going to have dinner. It might be a good idea, for us all to get together this winter."

"You really think, I'd spend time with Snow?"

David stared levelly, "Henry would like that, you know."

Regina shoved past him, shoulder to shoulder. David stumbled, the woman moved like a boulder! "I need to be going, as you can tell."

Hopefully David called, "And Christmas dinner?"

She snorted, "On a cold day in hell."

And so Regina did leave, the deputy sheriff standing alone. With a sad sigh, David picked up the phone. It was as if he suspected, the queen wouldn't bend. No matter what, he or Henry gave to recommend. The woman hated Christmas, and had no use for a truce. It seemed like there'd be one less present, around the traditional spruce.

Knowing it wasn't an argument worth having, David walked on, oblivious to the rhymes, and the fact that his flannel was clashing.

III

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next Up: In all honesty, the rhyming was getting old. And so with resolve, Emma set out to find Mr. Gold.


	3. Mr. Gold

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Cranky and snarly, Mr. Gold makes, for an excellent Marley

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for all the comments/kudos/subscriptions! I do not own the song "Welcome Christmas" from The Grinch Who Stole Christmas or the Scrooge song from A Muppet's Christmas Carol

This was getting to be unfair, Emma Swan thought as she stared at the toy store, falling apart from disrepair. She had searched all morning, and part of the day, to find this Kris Kringle, and hear what he had to say.

But the bearded man, was nowhere to be found, it was casing a headache, and making her head pound. The guy wasn't registered, as a citizen of Storybrooke, and because of that she was starting to think, he might be some sort of crook. She had asked the other owners, of the businesses beside the store- but not one of them had answers, no matter how hard Emma implored.

The toy store looked empty, doors locked and windows closed, and Emma suspected the abandoning, was the result of a magic entity. Leave it to Santa, to be on the run from the law. The man _was_ a menace, something that left her in guffaw.

Emma sighed, yet another dead end. There was no clear way, that this curse could be mend.

And because this rhyming, was starting to get old…Emma only had one choice.

And that was to go talk to Mr. Gold.

* * *

The curse had spread, that much was clear, as Emma walked into the pawnstore and Mr. Gold greeted, "Dear."

Emma exhaled, her nerves on a wire, "I'm guessing you noticed, we're speaking in choir?"

Mr. Gold grinned, from behind his display, "I can see that some curse, is clearly at bay."

The sheriff scowled, leaning forward, "This one is all Regina, though it seems to be moving outward."

"Ah, our dear Queen, has clearly met Kris Kringle," Mr. Gold said, today not wanting to mingle.

Emma groaned, "Is there any way we can stop speaking like a song?"

"And pray tell, Miss Swan, why would I need to correct this wrong?" Mr. Gold asked, his expression quite pleased, "If anything, all this rhyming, is starting to appease."

Emma swore, remembering why, Gold she deplored, "Look, it's annoying, and sooner or later you'll find this Christmas spirit…cloying."

"On the contrary," Gold said with a smirk, "Rhyming for me is quite ordinary."

Emma decided one thing- Mr. Gold was a jerk, "I wasn't going to do this, but you've left me no choice."

"Oh?" Asked Mr. Gold, interest in his voice.

"Come with me," Emma said, stepping outside and walking towards the town's tree.

Mr. Gold followed, eyes wide and unbelieving, as around a large Christmas tree…Storybrooke was  _singing._

Around the Christmas tree, their hands clasped and their bodies swaying, the people of Storybrooke issued sung decree:

" _Fa who dores, fa who fores, welcome Christmas bring your light~"_

Gold swallowed, this couldn't be right.

" _Fa who fores, fa who dores, welcome Christmas, Christmas day~"_

This wasn't normal, there was absolutely no way.

" _Welcome! Welcome! Fa who dores! Welcome, welcome fa do dores-"_

Mr. Gold felt something tug at his chest, a strange sensation that just wouldn't rest.

And as his heart, began to throb and throb, he spotted a familiar face, out amongst the mob.

"Sheriff Swan," he said, face wincing with pain, "Is that your father, leading the train?"

Emma groaned, her eyes landing on David, who sure enough, was singing with false antlers quite plush and a nose painted red.

"See what I mean, there has to be a stop," she turned in desperation, "Isn't there anything in your shop?"

Mr. Gold put his brain to the test, but that damn heart sensation, just wouldn't rest, "There's only one way, to stop this sort of spell," he inhaled quite deeply, "One that can only happen when it's frozen in hell."

Emma turned, "What do you mean?"

"The only way this will stop, is for Christmas spirit to find the Queen."

"You mean we're stuck like this, until she gets a conscience?"

Gold felt a split, down in his ribs, "Yes Sheriff Swan, why on earth would I fib?"

"We have to tell her, or else this curse will spread."

"And, I think if it continues," Gold scowled, "I may end up dead."

Emma's eyes went wide, "What are you trying to charge?"

He winced again, "That my heart is attempting…to grow three sizes too large."

She stared at him, maybe she'd need a pinch, "Are you trying to tell me…that you're Storybrooke's Grinch?"

Gold glared at her, "It was a long time ago, back when we were in the forest."

"So why aren't you trying to join in with the chorus?"

He shook his head, his chest filling with dread, "Things are different here, and the medical ramifications are clear."

Emma gave a sigh, she didn't like Gold, but that didn't mean he should die. "Alright, let's try and get this curse off of Regina."

Gold straightened, "I'll go speak with her, and make her see reason-a!" His heart, sensing a break in the rhyme, decided to throb quite painfully that time.

Emma gave a nod, swift and sure, "I'll keep looking for Santa, to see if there's a cure."

He gave a large grimace, "I'm starting to remember, why I really hate Christmas."

* * *

This day continued to grow worse and worse, Regina thought to herself, digging through her purse. All she had done, is started to walk down the street, but the further she went, the more a chorus started to repeat. It seemed this curse had spread, it had infected this town, from head to head. And as Regina turned the corner, to finish her walk home, she began to hear the people on the street, start to sing in a murmur.

Granny walked by with Ruby, her eyes darting to the queen with an expression quite mean, " _When you're a nasty person you reap it, you reap just what you sow."_

Ruby nodded, " _And there's nothing as nasty as causing nice people years of pain and woe._ "

Regina stared as Granny continued the song, " _It makes for a hardened person, who locks people in her lair."_

Ruby frowned, " _But the worst of the worst-"_

" _The most hated and cursed_ -" Interjected Granny.

And both of them sang,  _"Is the one that we call Mayor."_

Regina stared at them with confusion, going around the corner in hopes to lose them. As she was making, her quick escape, she ran into Jim and Kathryn, her mouth agape.

" _Declined friends,_ " she sang, somewhat sad.

" _Goes to any ends,"_  continued Jim, somewhat mad.

" _Is the one that we call Mayor,"_  they chorused, and Regina felt dread when their chorus started, joined by Granny and Red.

" _There goes Missus Evil,  
There goes Missus Fiend."_

Jim scowled,  _"If they gave a prize for worst queen, the winner would be she."_

Regina walked quickly, trying to get away fast. But it was for nothing, as Leroy and Walter blocked her path.

" _Oh Regina loves her magic because she thinks it gives her power,"_  Walter hummed.

Leroy frowned,  _"Because of her, I've been stuck singing here, for at least two hours."_

Enough was enough, Regina decided, as she started to run, to get away before these maniacs collided.

It was to no avail, she realized, they followed her, chorus resounding with flair.

" _There goes Missus Wicked  
There goes Missus Bad."_

Billy rounded the corner, feeling compelled to join in. It didn't matter that a few weeks ago, he had been found in a bin,  _"The undisputed mistress of making people mad."_

Kathryn took charge,  _"She curses folks and tortures them in the towers of her houses."_

Jim nodded,  _"She takes delight in all our misery-"_

Billy followed,  _"It's even worse for mouses."_

Regina continued to run, trying to lose this group. It was time to take desperate measures, to maybe fly the coop. As she thought of nasty spells, that would be sure to injure, as she rounded the corner she almost ran into Storybrook's resident ginger.

Archie stood there passively, a sympathetic look overtaking his face utterly,  _"She must be so lonely. She must be so sad. She goes to extremes to convince us she's bad. She's really a victim of fear and of pride. Just take one moment and your conscience will be your guide~~~"_

Regina pushed him hard, moving forward.

"Or not," Archie mumbled, looking downward.

The door was within sight, and she kept going towards it, trying to remove this singing blight.

" _There goes Missus Outrage  
There goes Missus Sneer."_

Ruby shook her head,  _"She makes excuses and tries to run."_

Walter yawned,  _"She rules us all with fear."_

Granny pursed her lips,  _"Don't even try to talk her down, because her rage will only rise."_

" _That's what you get, with an evil Queen,"_  Leroy picked up.

" _She's not even nice to us poor mice,"_  Billy agreed.

Regina held her keys in hand, soon she could slam the door in the face of this band.

" _There goes Missus Heartless,  
There goes Missus Rude."_

Walter shook his head,  _"She never gives, she only takes-"_

" _Her methods are real crude,"_  his brother dwarf continued.

Ruby snorted _, "Being mean's her way of life, she's cursed because she curses."_

Granny rolled her eyes,  _"Then all that magic's paying off, because this curse is getting worse."_

They all started singing in chorus again, but Regina paid no heed, for gated entry was soon to be her friend _, "All the time, with every rhyme, Regina's curse is getting worse."_

It was then that the queen did turn her door's lock, and when it slammed in the mob's faces, it was quite a shock. But Regina paid no mind, leaning against its frame, she was inside, and there was only one to blame.

Santa was cruel, his punishment quite unusual, and if he thought  _this_ would stop her, then he was a bearded fool, not to mention delusional.

Regina stood up, starting to feel calm. Now was the time, the find this curse's balm. With sure-footed steps, Regina crossed into her living room.

And who she saw there made her face fall with gloom.

"Why are you here?" Regina hissed to the couch.

"To help you, dear," Gold replied, straightening from his slouch.

"What makes you think, I'd want any of your aide?"

"Because I'm not the only one, who wants this curse to fade."

Regina glowered, her mood quite soured. This wasn't right, this wasn't her day. Now Gold was here, but hopefully not to stay.

"What do you suggest?" She asked, trying not to beg.

"There's a man you must impress," Gold replied, going to stand with his good leg.

"What are you saying? What do you mean?"

"I expected more intelligence from our queen."

Regina crossed her arms, her mind beginning to sound the alarms, "You know about this curse."

"You could say that, I've seen it rehearsed," Gold walked towards her, gait steady and sure, "I fear I'm in danger, of my heart growing oversized. That's because, I too have been cursed, though I doubt you're surprised."

"You're telling me, that you've been forced to find cheer?"

"More an allergic reaction, when such joys are near."

Regina pursed her lips, for once out of quips, "How do you suggest, I end this spell?"

Gold frowned, "It's not going to be pleasant, from what I can tell."

He was silence for a few moments, letting it sink. And when he spoke, Regina started to think, "You have until tomorrow, to repent for all those sorrows. Throughout the course of the night, you'll find yourself visited by spirits, both weak and of might."

"Spirits?" Regina spat, cynical to the core.

"Spirits," Gold repeated, as though talking to her was a chore, "They will force you to revisit, your Christmases past."

"Rumplestiltskin, I do believe, you're talking from your ass."

"Now that's rude, dearie, I'm only trying to help," Gold leaned in close, and Regina fought the urge to yelp, "You must see the beauty of the season, or your curse will be permanent, beyond all hope and reason."

"And if I fail to find all this good cheer?"

Gold frowned, "Then I suspect we're doomed, until you try again next year."

"What sort of spirits," Regina asked, hesitant in tone.

"That, you'll find out for yourself…when the bell tolls."

"The bell?"

"When the bell tolls one, you'll start your fun," Gold shook his head, "That's all I have for you dearie, for the rest, well, that's on your end."

Regina just glared, leaning on the wall, "And what do I owe for your house call?"

"Trust me dearie, the amusement pays for it all."

She hissed, "So what am I supposed to do? Wait for these ghosts?"

Gold just grinned, "I hear that they're attracted to boasts," he walked to the door, "Now I must leave, for this thudding in my chest, has failed to reprieve."

Regina stayed silent, watching him go.

And so she prepared to wait, for this stupid spirit to show.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I think I might have to make an Rumpelstiltskin as the Grinch fic now. It's too tempting. So. Look out for How the Imp Stole Christmas soon :P
> 
> Next Up: Revisiting the past, is no pleasant matter. Especially when the tour is guided, by a very mad hatter.


End file.
